Christmas Angel
5 Keys to Minimizing Holiday Stress
In an ideal world the holidays are a time when family comes together to
celebrate, there is peace on earth and goodwill abounds, children are well
behaved, teenagers are happy and cooperative and visiting family bring smiles,
compliments and gifts.
Sharing and caring with loved one sounds wonderful, but often there is an
undercurrent of tension that can make this a difficult and dreaded time for
some. Why does this happen, after all the holidays only come around once a year
and we deal with family tension all year round.
The answer is family dynamics, the need to live up to expectations, exhaustion
and finances. Families, who don't normally spend a lot of time together because
of work/school commitments or because of location, are now spending all of
several days together. People fall back into old patterns of behavior, old
arguments still simmer and issues that have been avoided have a way of coming to
the surface. Those involved can feel angry and unappreciated, which in turn
causes more tension and so the cycle begins.
Add to the mix a host who is exhausted from weeks of shopping, planning and
decorating, teenagers who resent the invasion of their space and time, young
children who just know how to capitalize on the fact that you have company and
you have a recipe for disaster
If you are hosting a family holiday event, you may find that the stress of
trying to create the perfect holiday season for the family begins many weeks
before the holiday actually arrives. Eliminating holiday tension and stress
would require a lifestyle change that very few people really want to make. You
can however make it more manageable.
- Accept that the holidays will come and there is nothing you can do about
it, be determined to be flexible and not sweat the small stuff
- Acknowledge that this is not an ideal world and that people don't change
just because it is the holidays. Your in-laws may snipe at your decor and
your cooking, your teenager will want to hang with friends than be stuck
with family and everybody else will still be the same. In the grand scheme
of things it does not matter, keep it in perspective, remember the "perfect
holiday" is different for everyone.
- Don't shop till you drop, instead make a list and stick to it. Holiday
spending can easily get out of control and leave you with a financial
headache for the New Year. Determine your budget and stick to it, be
ruthless.
- Don't let guilt or a misplaced sense of obligation force you into
attending parties and activities you would rather not go to. Pick events you
know you will enjoy and that means something to you and you will have a
great time.
- Consider your expectations of others during the holidays. When it comes
to the family photo, family functions, holiday activities, do you expect
your spouse and children to be shiny happy people for all such activities
and events. Don't let a tense situation develop just because they are not
behaving the way you think they should. Consider what they want to do and
talk about it.
In a nutshell be realistic, focus on the people you love, don't overspend, keep your sense of humor and you will keep your sanity. Life is short and time is precious, consider every holiday you spend with family and friends as a wonderful gift. Most important of all, Enjoy.
